Cela fait bien longtemps que je n'ai pas sorti de "sérigital" qui est, je le rappelle, une vaine tentative d'identification de l'usage du numérique dans les séries. Trouvez ici les épisodes passés. Je me lance que maintenant dans Ted Lasso. Dans le premier épisode, Rebecca Welton est la nouvelle propriétaire de l'AFC Richmond. Ce piètre club de Premier League était l'unique passion de son ex-mari volage :
- Rebecca - See, my ex-husband truly loved only one thing his entire life: this club. And Ted Lasso is gonna help me burn it to the ground. 'Cause I want to torture Rupert. I want him to feel like he's being fucked in the ass with a splintered cricket bat. Just in and out, over and over, in a constant loop. Like a GIF. That's what GIFs do, isn't it? They're just... endless.
- Leslie - That's correct. Though some people pronounce it "JIF."
Ashley : "But we see at least a 23% uptick in social media mentions and hero hashtags when there's a team-up. People love a team-up."
The Deep : " Fucking idiots. I could be doing so much more. But no, Vought just wants me to make my big pretty dives into the water and flash my fucking biceps for Instagram. I mean, sure, four million hits a day, but still, it's fucking demeaning."
Kevin - I'm creeping on my ex. Nicky - What's that even mean? Kevin - I'm Internet stalking her. God, you're old. It's my-my ex, Zoe. Her documentary won a prize at this Rome film festival, and she's posted all these photos. And every single one, she's with this hot guy. See that? What do you think of that? Just friends? Nicky - Yeah. Oh, yeah, definitely. Kevin - Yeah? Nicky - Yeah. But they're also having sex. What is this... Kevin - What are... Whoa, whoa, whoa. No, no, no. What are you doing? Nicky - I'm trying to make the picture bigger. What... Kevin - Well, you didn't make it bigger. You touched the heart, man. You touched the heart. Now she knows I'm stalking her.
Julia : "we face the same problem… baseball is dying. You've seen the demographics. Anyone under the age of 20 would rather watch e-sports than a baseball game. But I was able to increase attendance in Scranton Wilkes-Barre by 60%. How? 'Cause I know there's one inescapable fact about baseball. It's fun to go see a game. Maybe boring as shit to watch on TV, fade into the background on the radio, but in person... it's like the goddamn circus came to town. Except without all the elephant torture."
Mr. Benjamin - What's with all the phones?
Julia - Augmented reality. Future of live entertainment. A composite between the real world and the digital world. Right now they're all playing a game called "Beasts of Bedlam." They're using their phones to battle and capture monsters. So I partnered with the creators and made the stadium a realm of rare creatures. Video games on your phone.
Mr. Benjamin - My fat grandson plays those all the time, but what's that have to do with baseball? You promised me fans for life. This... this is a gimmick.
(…)
Mr. Benjamin - Why are they all going crazy?
Julia - 'Cause we just made the game real to them. This'll be their favorite memory of favorite their thing, and they'll be forever drawn to Tampa to see if we're as fun as they remember. Nostalgia. It's the most powerful drug there is.
Amy - Hey, good news. They're inviting several Nobel Laureates to our reception.
Sheldon - Oh, great, like who?
Amy - Uh... Makoto Kobayashi.
Sheldon - Da-- ooh.
Amy - What?
Sheldon - Well, I may have been less than kind to him about his Nobel Prize win.
Amy - Why?
Sheldon - I was jealous, angry and new to Twitter. It was a dangerous combination.
Amy - I am not gonna spend weeks in a library looking up old papers. Can't we hire a grad student to do it?
Sheldon - Yeah, a grad student? I am not trusting our unpublished paper to some millennial. They'll put unicorn emojis on it and then post it on social media.
Penny - if this woman's gonna be around, I think we should check her out a little. I looked online. She doesn't have an Instagram, which means she's either 80 or something's wrong with her.
Dennis - Who the hell are the Whites, anyway?
Ricky - Some tech dude. Made an app that matches dogs for playdates.
Amber - So, like Tinder for dogs?
Ricky - Yeah, but they always down to fuck.
TTD - Damn, man! People keep stealin' all my good ideas!
Brockmire - Really? We never did finish that four-way that we started back in Morristown. You know what can make this dream come true is Twitter. We love Twitterers. "Who wants to have sex with me" and my best friend, hashtag Brockmire, hashtag...Hashtag four-way."
Il va falloir que je parle un peu de la série Brockmire à l'occasion en lui dédiant un "5 bonnes raisons de voir". D'icil là, voici une petite compilation de répliques pour alimenter la catégorie sérigital.
S01E01 "Rally Cap"
Brockmire - Well, may I ask your qualifications, son?
Jules - He's, uh, basically an Internet whiz kid.
Charles - Uh, yeah. I, um... I have the most Twitter followers in town. I, uh, have over 4 million Vine loops in total. DJ Khaled once shouted me out on a jet ski.
Jules - 10 years ago, your breakdown in the booth and... and press conference were like the original viral videos. So that's pretty neat. Right?
Brockmire - All right, just get it off. Get it off, please.
Charles - Get it off of where?
Brockmire - Make it go away.
Charles - Well, I can't.
Brockmire - No, don't pause... Just get it... Get it off of there.
Charles - Hey, the thing is, I can't get it off 'cause it's on the Internet. So it's... it's forever.
Jules - It's permanent.
Brockmire - So people just watch videos of the worst moments of my life and just laugh at my pain?
S01E05 "Breakout Year"
Charles - The second meltdown video is trending on Twitter again.
Brockmire - What? That was two days ago. Who's still watching that stupid thing?
Charles - Well, I mean, it got a big boost when it circulated through local and national news.
Brockmire - How is Jim Brockmire yelling at a minor-league ball game national news?
Charles - The news now is pretty much anything that was on the Internet yesterday.
Charles - They are not assholes. They just want a little bit of heat from your Internet fame, like that you kid you just screamed at downstairs.
Brockmire - It just happened. How do you know about that?
Charles - Because that's Pussyhound14! He has 4 million followers on Vine. He uploaded the video of you just now. 80,000 loops already.
Brockmire - Oh, God. Yeah, I hate everybody.
Charles - Uh, we're reaching the end of our Internet-fame cycle, and these things move very fast. It starts with videos, then memes, conventional media, late-night monologues, and then finally, if my mom's seen it, we're dead.
Brockmire - Well, how long does all that take?
Charles - Five days, a week tops. And my mom just sent me the link. We need to hurry.
Brockmire - Well, hey. Put me in, Coach. I mean, uh, what's the plan?
Charles - Okay, um, if we're going to immediately capitalize on your fame, then we need to take a shotgun approach. Just insert you into a bunch of popular video formats like acoustic versions of songs, charity dares, playful dogs with Down Syndrome. But if none of those hit, then I'm afraid we're gonna have to start moving our way into creepy YouTube. Like ASMR.
Kate - I can't believe you brought me here. Thank you.
Chuck - I was surprised to learn the viral videos so afflicted you.
Kate - Oh. They don't... usually... but I mean...
Dans le quinzième épisode de la onzième saison de The Big Bang Theory, Sheldon en veut à Wil Wheaton de présenter le programme télévisé "Professor Pronton"
(Amy)- So, you're just gonna sit here by yourself and do nothing?
(Sheldon)- Of course not. I'm going to write mean comments about Wil's show online.
(Amy)- Well, you can't criticize something you haven't seen.
(Sheldon)- I'm sorry, are you familiar with the Internet?
Dennis - Damn! Tom and Gisele floating on a 300-footer in Saint-Tropez. Man, that's a long-ass way from that raft we used to float on at Jim McMahon's aboveground pool.
Ricky - Where you see that?
Dennis - Where I see everything... 'Gram.
Ricky - You follow Tom Brady?
Dennis - Just so I don't look like a creep following his wife. Plus, he only posts pictures of him practicing and wearing them ugly-ass Uggs.
TTD - Wait, I can't believe they let your old ass on the 'Gram, Dennis.
Dennis - Motherfucker, there's no age limit looking at fine-ass women.
(...)
Dennis - Look at Tommy. This is what I'm saying. "Practicing with my boys, Edelman, Gronk, and Amendola."
Ricky - God. And when was that?
Dennis - Yesterday.
Ricky - What? Get the fuck out of here. These motherfuckers practicing without me.
Dennis - Come on, Ricky, they in Boston, man.
Ricky - Well, shit, Edelman lives in LA and Gronk lives here in Miami. Last time I checked, Amendola was in Botswana. Yet, they get the call and I get the proverbial stiff arm?
Dennis - Yeah, yeah, you're right.
Ricky - That's bullshit.
Dennis - You're right, you're right. Fuck Brady. Fuck him. I'ma unfollow his ass any motherfucking way.
- How's our favorite Dallas Cowboys executive this fine morning? - Have you seen Vernon Littelfield's recent wardrobe choices on Instagram? - No. What, is he mixing stripes and plaids again? - You clearly don't grasp the gravity of the situation. I suggest you talk to that young man. Immediately.
- Dev - When's your boo arriving here?
- Denis - She should be here in a few minutes.
- Dev - Wow. Thanksgiving invite. Must be serious.
- Denis - Yeah, man. I really like her.
- Dev - Nice. What's her Instagram name? I want to look her up.
- Denis - Dude, you're literally gonna meet her in a few minutes.
- Dev - I know, but I want to look it up beforehand, get a vibe.
- Denis - I forgot.
- Dev - You forgot? Look it up.
- Denis - NipplesAndToes23.
- Dev - W-what's that?
- Denis - NipplesAndToes23.
- Dev - Denise! You can't be dating some girl with the Instagram name NipplesAndToes23.
- Denis - I know, man. I'm trying to get her to change it.
- Dev - I'm surprised there was 22 other NipplesAndToes. Let's see what we got here. Oh, wow. These are some provocative photos.
- Denis - Okay, don't be looking at my girl, man.
- Dev - Ooh. Really into fitness.
- Denis - She is kind of naked there.
- Dev - Well, maybe I shouldn't just paint her with one brush. She's clearly very political. "I just voted."
- Denis - Man, that wasn't for no damn election. That was for "So You Think You Can Dance."
- Dev - Does she have some sort of intense fabric allergy? 'Cause she is scantily clad in a lot of these photos, Denise.
